- an inspiring, charming person who was
- strong-willed and kind-hearted,
- weird in an endearing, d.g.a.f way,
- courageous, active, a leader,
- loving, happy, and zesty.
I almost feel a reflex of shame as I think about how I'd like to be remembered. Maybe because I'm not there yet or maybe because I've been conditioned against any sense of self, confidence, and overly-sentimental mentalities. Against this reflex, I just want to slap myself silly and say, who the f**k cares? So what you want to leave a legacy? Many people, deep down, are searching for a legacy and deeper meanings to their meager existences! Just know that somehow, you're going to write a book, forge new paths in health services, and make sweet, sweet love wherever you go. (Calm your silly minds, can I just use words without double entendre?)
Spitefully, I'm dissatisfied with my current legacy palette. I just can't pinpoint the missing ingredient. A little more spunk? More polarization? Or are my amiability and ability to see from other POVs facets of personality that cannot thrive in extremity? Can I start drawing lines in the sand without compromising the colors of the wind?
In the end, thinking about a potential legacy deeply means I must face my internal values and the pitfalls of my ego. I am by no means perfect and nowhere near a finished product. There are many other things I'd like to become and I'd be lying if I said that I would be completely at peace with my life if I died today. Boiled down: my internal compass directs me towards human relationships and passing on love, hope, curiosity, and exploration. Simply because those things, to me, are beautiful. And I'm happy that I have today, and hopefully tomorrow, to reach for those beautiful things.
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Give a little time to me- we'll burn this out- We'll play hide and seek #givemelove |
Currently Listening: Give Me Love (Ed Sheeran); Night Changes (One Direction)
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